Shower

I visited my family last week and because they dont expect to see me again until after the baby is born, they organized a baby shower for me. They invited about 40 family members and friends--very traditional, all women. Tons of food, tons of cake, tons of gifts. Only a few "games" (thank GOD), and even those were actually not horrible. My favorite was "baby jeopardy" that my sister made up, with categories like "celebrity moms" and "growth and development." It was TOO cute.

I left with lots of sleepers and onesies and socks and receiving blankets. A few toys, the baby monitor we registered for. Lots of cash and giftcards. My mom and sisters bought us the stroller/travel system that we wanted (actually, gave us a GC for exactly the amount with a note specifying what we were to use it for). Everything is still in the box that we packed it in, waiting for the completion of the nursery so that we have somewhere to put it all! Oh, and when we got home, there were 3 more gifts waiting: some of the nursery bedding, a box of baby clothes, and a vibrating chair--the very one made famous by that episode of Sex and the City. Remembering the episode, Spouse casually suggested that we skip the chair and just buy the baby a vibrator....

As much as I love the stuff--and I do love the stuff--i cant help but feel a little freaked out by all of it. It just feels a bit premature to have all of this at 5 months. I said this (quietly) to my favorite cousin and my grandmother, and my grandmother said that it used to be considered bad luck to buy things for a baby before it was born. That was comforting, Grandma! Actually, though I'm not superstitious per se, I think that might have been what i was feeling... like maybe it was risky to plan this far ahead....

I also wonder if that feeling every really goes away? Maybe when you get down to just a few weeks before your due date? When you can feel the baby all the time and his/her existance is never very far from your consciousness?

Or maybe when the nursery has walls and doors. Maybe THAT is when you feel safe to assume that this is really going to happen the way that its supposed to happen....